I too am not a bit tamed, I too am untranslatable,
I sound my barbaric yawp over the roofs of the world.
The Los Angeles Philharmonic New Music Group premiered my new piece for two harps and two re-tuned pianos, Sunt Lacrimae Rerum (these are the tears of things), on September 19, 2021 at the Ojai Music Festival. I wrote the first major passage of this piece on September 9th, 2020, the day the sun never came up in the San Francisco Bay Area. The sky hummed with a dark orange glow, the only vestige of our star hidden by wildfire smoke high in the air. Already more than five months into the pandemic, which had stripped nearly every routine and accounting for the future, the feeling of becoming unmoored from the certainty of the rising sun, that engrained metaphor carried by a new day every 24 hours, cast an apocalyptic shadow unlike anything I’d experienced before or expect to experience again. And yet the music that I felt, the music that exists in the following pages, was ecstatic — music for dancing, the barbaric yawp, a scream of joy.